Tell someone to Eat a Bag of Dicks with this festive Christmas Card!

Tell a person in your life to "EAT A DICK" in the best way possible way. CARD READS:FRONT: "I like You How I Like My Christmas Tree"INSIDE: "Erect"MATERIAL DETAILS:CARD SIZE:...

Trust us, size doesn't always matter! These teenie weenies are perfectly circumferenced to accommodate all beverage vessel types! Be it a beer bottle, can, wine glass, or your trusty mug, protect...

Because boring old confetti just isn't cocky enough! Jazz up your tables and spreads with this one of kind and oh so cocky, cockfetti! 

We've all seen the famous and timeless snake in a can prank.  If you haven't, you've been living under a rock. Either way, we here at Dick At Your Door...

Not crazy about this ornament? Make like Santa at a strip club, and take a look around. Our horny elves have been working nonstop on all sorts of unique Christmas...

Email us what you'd like your cock to say!

"All I want for Christmas Is Your Dick" Greeting Card

“MERRY CHRISTMAS...I GOT YOU A PRESENT” Perfect addition to any DicksByMail.com product this Christmas season. As seen on Saturday Night Live, send your friends or (fr)enemies a Dick in a...

The Official Dick Towel. As seen on Always Sunny in Philadelphia, now available at DicksByMail.com!!   It’s a tiny bird, a huge unit, and tight buns all rolled into one...

Solid chocolate. Solid insult. Solid gold prank. You know what’s better than sending someone flowers? Sending them a giant chocolate dick they have to unwrap, stare at, and decide if...